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Maintaining their self-belief and image of perfection

Although narcissists are extremely insecure, jealous and heartless, they want to believe that they are perfect.

And they want others to believe this also.

By projecting their fears, mistakes and poor behaviors onto others,

it helps them to maintain a ‘good guy’ or ‘good girl’ image. 

They need to be in control of how others see them.

And they will do whatever it takes to avoid looking bad or being at fault.

Image by Liza Summer

Narcissists would rather blame others for everything that goes wrong in their lives,

instead of taking responsibility for their own mistakes or their own decisions in life.

This is why narcissists do not change.

They cannot change unless they admit to themselves, that they have made a mistake.

And their ego will always believe that they are too perfect to make mistakes,

so therefore, the problem must be everyone else.

Narcissists will accuse the one they are mistreating for mistreating them,

and sadly, they often believe their own gaslighting.

They truly feel that they are the victim in the situation that they initially created themselves.

This is why they can be so convincing to the outside world that they are the victim of someone else’s wrong doing.

They cannot and will not want to believe they brought it on themselves.

There is no point trying to convince the narcissist of the seeing the truth,

because they will only believe their own narrative.

And their narrative is created to protect their fragile ego.

Image by John Ray Ebora

Narcissists live in their own world, they do not live in reality.

In their own world, they are always the victim who is flawless and perfect,

and everyone else are the flawed perpetrators.

Unconscious delusion

A narcissist‘s projection is usually done subconsciously.

Most of the time, they may not be aware of this behavior they impose onto others.

That is why attempting to defend yourself or explaining anything to the narcissist is often a waste of time.

Image by Ketut Subiyanto

Their ego is so fragile, that anything that threatens to offend it will automatically be rejected and projected onto someone else.

And often it is targeted onto the individual that has offended them.

It is as if the narcissists are programmed to believe that all their actions are right.

So, if others are against their beliefs, it is the fault or problem of others because others must be wrong.

This way of thinking sounds completely delusional, but that’s because it is.

Narcissists choose to defend and accept the lies of their false image,

rather than to accept to truth of reality.

The only way they can feel powerful and in control is to desperately believe that their false reality is true.

Image by Pixabay

So therefore, they cannot allow the truth to destroy the fictitious narrative or false image they hide behind.

Projection is their defense that supports and protects their delusional belief of a perfect self.

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Awareness is power.